*and yeah, I said ‘past’ crush cause now I have another one, argh gosh*
I hope you’re all having a great day! I am! I’m having exams these days which is stressing the eff out of me, but I wish the baddest things that happened in life were exams, right?
So let’s just enjoy life today!
Today’s post idea was suggested by Bayance *check out her blawwwwwwg* some time ago, I made a blog (which you can read right here) post where I mentioned I had got over a crush and she wanted me to make a post talking about it.
I’m so sorry Bayance I took so long 😭💙
Any let’s start:
how i got over my past crush:
Well, this is obvs not a tutorial on how to get over a crush, cause I’ve watched loads of those videos on the internet and trust me baby that
sh!t don’t work
There’re lots of things that can affect when you’re getting over it:
- How in love you were
- How OBSESSED you were
- How long you’d been in love
- Whether you’re still seeing them or not and how often
- The hobbies you have or how busy you are
- Your mindset
- Your self-esteem *believe it or not this plays a huge part, if I hadn’t had this, I would’ve probably fallen into depression*
- Your amount of motivation (on the long run and short term)
- the list goes on…
This means everybody is different and everyone will take a different amount of time to get over it. Me, it took me a year and 3-4 months to get over it. I know, it was a long time, no need to remind me 😂😂
Going back to the videos, I actually googled how to get over a crush and I stumbled upon an article that gave a formula *yes, a freaking FORMULA* on when you’re getting over your crush
stupid formula less reliable than freaking zodiac signs:
- x= the amount of time you’ll take to get over your crush
- m= the amount of time you’ve been in love with them
So basically you take the amount of time you’ve been in love and divide by 2.
According to that, it would take me 2 yeas to get over it, so technically by now I wouldn’t be over it yet, I would still have to wait 3 months. I know, it makes no sense, so forget that.
My evolution went like this:
During the first months I was constantly thinking of him and crying everyday and basically I wasn’t putting any effort in getting over it, it was as if I didn’t want to get over it, as if feeling sad helped at all.
Then at one point I realized I actually had to put effort in trying to get over it and stop doing some of the habits that reminded me of him – and I said some cause everything I did and said reminded me of him.
I had several mental breakdowns that lasted days, but not a long time after, I noticed changes. It wasn’t the things I did, but they helped a little. I think it was just time. Time was healing me, it was making me feel better.
I didn’t notice a big change until I had my last mental breakdown, which was probably the worst of them all. Why? Well, after having been kind of happy for some time, having another mental breakdown and feeling like sh!t makes you realized how sad you’ve been and it makes you irritated and just tired of being sad. And because I thought I was never getting over it, that just made me the saddest I’ve ever been.
But then summer came and school was over and I got to not only do the things I liked, but also I went on holiday to see the fam and blah blah… that felt super good! I started not really looking back.
And from there I’ve been feeling better and better as time went by. Now I’m at my happiest points in my life.
things that’ll help you get over it and will stop you from getting depressed:
- Self esteem: A lot of people who are depressed either hate themselves, or are ashamed of themselves, or feel guilt, or just think they’re not good enough. If you love yourself no matter what and value yourself, you shouldn’t develop depression.
- Motivation: My motivation dropped by 50% pretty much, but I still had dreams and I still wanted to do many things when I grew up and wanted to achieve this and that, so that kept me willing to live.
- Time: Like I said, time made me feel better. Nothing specific happened, it was just time. I don’t know if it either makes you forget certain things, or it makes you get used to this new chapter of your life… but it really does something huge. So be patient.
Take this into consideration:
When you feel sad, it’s not just a feeling you’re going through, it’s a chemical balance in your brain that can change other things in your body without you realizing or wanting it.
You inmune system gets really weak when you’re sad. Me, I got cold after cold after cold last year, I lost my voice 2 times. This year I haven’t really gotten any colds, the ones I got were pretty mild. See the difference?
Not only that, other weird things were happening, like me feeling cold even in summer, my hands falling asleep for no reason, me smelling things that weren’t there, feeling physical pain, fatigue, feeling tired all the time…
Don’t get me wrong, being sad is okay, everyone has the right to be sad sometimes. What I’m saying is, don’t make the same mistake as me, always try to feel better, don’t let the bad thoughts guide you, try to fight against it, take your health into consideration.
I was gonna do a conclusion paragraph, but I didn’t know how to wrap this up, also I didn’t want to make things easier for you, read the whole thing, ya lazy!
Share your thoughts with me!
Do you have a crush? Or did you? How did you get over it? Have you ever been depressed? How did you get through it? Is there anything you’d like to say about this? Tell meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Thanks again Bayance for the idea, hope this helped you one way or another 😛
I hope you liked this post as much as I liked writing it! I also hope you have an amazing day/nigth and an amazing week! Don’t let crushes nor exams ruin your mental health!